WLW: One Year Later

Well peeps, here were are.

This post is a milestone. It was one year ago that I decided I was sick and tired of being a fatass and it was past time to do something about it.

At that time, I weighed in at a hefty 235.5 pounds. Goddamn, my head was fucking wide.... I'd finally gained fat on my face. That was insane.

Putting the "belly" in bellydancer... This is actually a freakishly good angle.

I decided to cut out sugar in all it's forms to start with, go on a schedule of eating properly for 12 days then getting two days off.

This worked well for a couple months. Then I realized that have no sugar in my system was almost as bad as having too much, so I started to incorporate complex carbs back in.

I think I did alright up until Thanksgiving. After that, things seems to go to shit. Maybe because it was winter, maybe I'd lost my drive. I don't know. But I had a bitch of a time trying to lose for something like 5 months. I wanted to cry almost every day, I'm actually astounded that I didn't.

Instead, I set a different goal. Instead of the main focus being weight loss, I was going to get in shape for derby season! Yeah, that'll keep me motivated!

It did, for the most part. I worked out every morning at 6 a.m., and then went to the walking track after work. I didn't lose a pound at this point, but I was starting to tighten up. That was a good sign, I thought.

I also redid the Learn to Run 10k with my sister, with the goal of doing a 10k in April. Which I did, along with my coach and derby wife and derby twin. We finished dead last – my fault, because I'm stupid slow – but we finished.

By that point we'd moved back into the big space for derby practices and started to get things going for the upcoming bouting season. Running fell by the wayside a bit... okay, a lot.

Then, I started recording everything I eat on My Fitness Pal, which made me realize I was eating not too bad, but way too much. That's been a pretty big help in curbing what and how much I eat.

Around that time I decided I was going to take a natural approach to eating, reduce my meat intake and not eat anything that had any unpronounceable ingredients.

Yeah, then we started bouting and that went right out the window.

So that's my year in a nutshell. In all that time I'm managed to take off a whopping..... are you ready for this?

15 pounds.

That's it.

Sigh.

I mean, I lost something. It's better than not losing anything, I guess. Kind of a downer though. When I started this whole mess I figured I'd be able to take off like 40 or 50 pounds. Most people would have! Not Ginger. Nope. I originally hit the 15 pound mark back in fucking October for fuck's sake!

I suck.

...

I'm sorry, that's the PMS talking. See, I've got this nasty little problem that I can't seem to recall if I've discussed here before and upon a (very) quick perusal of all my previous entries I don't see it anywhere.

I have a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. This isn't a new development – I've known I've had it since I was 17. My doctor at the time discovered it through blood work and it's basically a hormone imbalance. While girls are supposed to have a certain amount of estrogen and testosterone, more of the former than the latter, I actually have more testosterone than I should and not enough estrogen.

Because of the weird imbalance, my body wants to weigh 300 pounds. I don't weigh 300 pounds, so I must be doing something right.

So I'm gonna hold a little pity party for the rest of the night, but when I get up tomorrow that's done. It's a brand new day, year and so on.

Question for anyone that reads this... should I continue these WLW posts? Does anyone care? Should I do something different? I don't know if it's helped beyond being an outlet for me to vent, but maybe that's enough? I don't know.

I'm gonna go crawl into bed with a book now. My holidays start in a couple days and like I said last year, going to Mom's is like going to a fat farm. Maybe it'll be the thing I need.

For now, here's my meh face for the day.

 Meh.

Reflections and Recollections,

Ginger.